I survived #Dommeagedon

Let me say from the start, this is one of the hardest blogs i've ever written. It would be so easy to be critical of the behaviour of some of those attendees. But of course, that would be unfair and detract for the mostly fun that was had over the four days. So here goes...

How does one describe when 12 Mistresses and 16 submissive's or slaves all come together for a long weekend in deepest Norfolk for the 2nd annual Femme Domme Retreat hosted by Mistress Ava Von Medisin? Well I'm not quite sure there is a descriptive noun, but Dommeageddon seemed to strike a chord with many of the attendees and henceforth, it will be called that! I even have a t-shirt to prove i survived.

To the event! This was the 2nd such event organised by Mistress Ava Von Medisin who, many will know, I am in a D/s collared relationship with. Not quite for a year but close. I attended the first event last year but at that time, I was still under consideration and on some form of probation, which I obviously passed, given I now wear Her collar when with Her. But that's an aside. This event was going to be bigger with more Mistresses and slaves, a professional cook (more of that later) and organised events. Lots of well known Mistresses were in attendance and I was lucky enough to know most of them along with their attending slaves. In the months building up to this, I was very concious that I was letting my own anxieties and fears  start to take control. My emotional self over-ruling my logical self and my dread of public humiliation games becoming stronger with each passing week. But not going was never an option for me, given my status and I can't really imagine the consequence of not attending.

As we got closer to the date, instructions were given, rules sent (rules.. yes rules!) for the behaviour of the slaves etc, and times to arrive. Eventually, the day comes and I set off from home for the 150 mile drive to the event. The Retreat is held in a large country house, that can easily sleep 16 in the house and has 3 cottages associated with it that allow another 12. So each Mistress had her room and some of the lucky slaves had their own room. I knew that would be sleeping on the floor, in Mistresses room and had packed suitable bedding. I had also packed enough fetish wear for a week, toys, weapons and sundry other items. One can never have to much D/s related paraphernalia is seems. Ropes, cuffs, whips, paddles etc etc all there for use as and when required.

My first job, after changing into suitable clothing (black leather kilt and waistcoat seeing as you ask) was to greet the Mistresses as they arrived and show them to their pre-allocated rooms. This all before the first event of the weekend, the drinks reception and canapés at 9pm. And so the fun starts.

During the retreat we were to have two birthdays and tonight was the first. Slave A was on his first trip to the retreat along with his Mistress. Any birthday celebration needs cake and candles and these were produced. But of course, this is a Femme Domme retreat and nothing is done in a normal way. The cake was set on the floor and slave A was then allowed to eat it but only from the heel of his Mistress. After that, the cake was pushed around the room, by his nose, to each Mistress in turn who all made him eat cake from their heel or sole. All well and good, and very funny. Then the candles. Having stripped to the waist, each Mistress took turns in dripping wax onto slave A until a rainbow of wax covered his upper body and having pulled his leggings down, other areas. As an on looker i found myself wishing i was there with the wax, it being one of those types of pain i relish and actually become aroused by. But at the same time, i also wanted it in private in a room with just the gentle breathing of Mistress. That's my struggle. How to give myself over to those that, whilst i know them, have no desire to accept any pain or dominance from them. I know, from a recent conversation, that Mistress does not want to share me. And more, i find myself not wanting to be shared. To only receive pain, punishment and pleasure from Her hand.

The second birthday took place the following night and was for Mistress Ava's personal Pet. For this, balloons were the order of the day. But of course, hot to connect balloons to the skin.. why.. medical skin staples of course. The balloons has previously been filled with glitter balls, streamers etc and once inflated, stapled to pet. Now the fun. Each Mistress that wanted to take part was asked to burst a balloon but.. with a whip. Lesson learnt here. Whips are not very good at bursting balloons. In fact, they tend to just tear them off rather than burst them. Some did burst though and had the desired effect. All good fun. Of course, the evening was still young. Prior to this, all the slaves had served at the formal dinner, with some success. My role was easy. Keep the wine flowing and glasses filled. I have no problem doing this, but gentle reminders to others that this was my job.. I become a glass filling nazi! For this event, i was wearing red latex kilt and top. So what, you may say. Well, this was important to me. This particular outfit I had made some years back. It's one of my favourite pieces of latex. Last year, i showed it to Mistress Ava but was unable to wear it. A year later, sufficient weight lost that i could wear it with comfort. A small personal achievement from a goal set a year ago to Mistress.

One of my mental blocks when it comes to pain has always been having my arse hit. Caning, cropping, paddling.. all things I've managed to avoid and often have as a hard limit. However, this conflicts with my inner need to give myself totally to Mistress Ava is such that i cannot really accept inside myself that my arse is off limits. We had discussed me getting some paddles to see how i coped and i had duly purchased two new paddles, one from LAM and one from Hell In Leather. Having been told to get my bag, i sort of knew was was coming and started to find ways of accepting it. Having found a suitable position, the paddling started. One thing to note with Mistress. There is never any warm-up. Just straight in, Even knowing that, nothing really prepares you for the first time your arse is hit with a leather paddle. Yes, it hurt. Yes, i wriggled and yes I cried out. But i also knew i had to accept what was coming. After all, i had pretty much asked for this. What i found surprising though, was how quickly i started to relax into it and with acceptance came a feeling of wanting more and not resisting. I suspect i'll never be a confirmed, hardcore spanking lover but i know inside myself that if i'm told i'm going to be paddled or spanked, it won't fill me with dread.

Whilst all this was going on, a good friend was also being hit. And when I say hit, I mean hit hard. Have you ever seen an Alabama Prison Strap? It's probably one of the scariest things i have ever seen used on a human being and seeing it used was something i'll never forget! Worse though.. someone wanted to use it on me! Now, i have a bad habit of laughing as a nervous reaction. I can't help it and know that i do it but unable to stop it. And seeing that strap hover over my body, about to be used i can tell You i was laughing like a drain! Fear was in my eyes and nothing would ever be able to prepare me for it. i'll say this. It wasn't used on me in anger. It was dropped onto me and even that stung.. run if you see you as you'll never want to be hit with that!

Whilst writing this, I wondered if it should be a blow by blow (no pun etc) account of the time or just a sense of what we did. There is much of the general minutiae of the day, in keeping a large house running, making sure the Mistresses are looked after with tea, drinks, tea,.. seemingly endless cups of tea! My main role seemed to be to drive to the shops to collect pre-ordered food, items we'd run out of (who knew so much water would be drunk) etc. So the day would go quite quickly. The evenings were when we had the fun, so to speak.

Remember I said we had a chef. Well, Sunday morning came and the news was the chef had done a runner! Not sure why he had really volunteered but there you go. Luckily, we had a slave who was well trained in cooking so not all bad. But it does go to show, even the best laid plans can to amiss at times.

Sunday was also to be the day of Cuntry Games (sic) and the dreaded "Afternoon Tea" (yes.. more tea). After more of my driving duties were carried out, the fun was to start. It seems that "cuntry games" mainly consist of carrying sex toys in a relay race between your knees. More ritual humiliation for those that took part and for which i managed to avoid having been told to change into my new alter-ego  Mistresses Wife (and that's all you're going to know).

Afternoon Tea - how has this once serene tradition been transformed into a prosecco fueled exercise in humiliation and ritual etiquette much loved by Mistresses in the UK?  I'm not sure how i managed to avoid this event, but somehow i was absent for most of it, just being asked to carry a few cake stands up to the drawing room. This is perhaps my secret. i keep out of the way and hope i won't be notices by my absence until i'm really needed. It's clear to me that some submissives are very service oriented. I'll admit to trying to be more service oriented but I usually fail and my cheeky side takes over, pushing limits where i see an opportunity for merriment. That said, it all went well with lots of tea (a recurring theme) drunk by the Ladies. The evening games were to be the most fun and soon, dinner eaten, kitchen cleaned, crockery put away the fun did indeed start.

One of the pieces of dungeon equipment bought to the house was a portable sling and frame. i've already had several sessions on this and love it. Having seen that it was up, i had a good idea of what may be happening and suitable clothing and preparations were made about myself. Let me say now...one of the highlights of the weekend was being fucked, on a sling, by a latex clad nun! To get there, i was allowed to be taken by three other Mistresses until eventually Mistress Ava, latex clad with full nuns wimple on took me. Here i have a confession, My nipples, which had been the subject of attacks pretty much constantly whilst in Mistress Ava's reach, were sore. Very sore. In fact, as sore as they have ever been. And with one Mistress attacking my nipples, another smothering my mouth and nose, whilst wearing a ball-gag and then a rather large dildo inside me, it all became a bit too much and i had to cry mercy. It's rare for me to do so but trying to focus on one thing with two others going on became too much to deal with. I don't often apologise - much better to not make a mistake in the first place - but here, if the Mistresses concerned read this, i do. Around me, in the room, others were being abused and used. It was quite lewd and the smell of latex and lube the main aroma.

Eventually all came to an end and we retired to the hot-tub room for the much needed relaxation and come down. With the weekend coming to a close, it was just nice to sit, relax, massage feet and look back on the past three days. One more breakfast to get through and the event would come to a close.

So, here we are, A week later, finally recovered with sleep and now already starting to think about next years retreat. What can I say.. I'm a sucker for punishment and abuse but I have no choice but to attend all the time i'm collared to Mistress Ava and i wouldn't have it any other way.