A New Year

Well, its 9 days into 2009 and I suspect this is going to be a very grim year from a financial perspective. I know of many friends who have lost their jobs, working in the financial sector as I do and as a consequence they are looking at their lifestyle and what can be cut back. Fetish would seem to be high on the list.

Still, we cannot help the way we are programmed and for me, I cannot imagine a life where it did not involve indulging myself in latex and pain when the urge takes me (which is pretty much all of the time I suspect). One couple who seem to have a fantastic sex life and a lot of fun are Alex and Suze whose blog I discovered for the first time this weekend (I was searching for something totally unrelated but such is the nature of Google) and it made for some very funny and at times erotic reading.

I have already ventured out once this year to a fetish club, going to Suberversion. Now, this is a good club. But I HATE THE VENUE. Sorry but the venue sucks. I know there are issues with finding good venues for fetish clubs in London as licensing laws seems to be getting stricter. But The Hub is just not good. I suspect I will not go there again as I hate the venue so much. On the other hand, Pedestal is a great club with a great venue. So it can be done when needed and makes Pedestal a club I make every effort to attend.

You can be a Pro and still be in charge

I love this post by Ms Slide. To me, it is the best definition of the relationship between a Professional Mistress and a paying submissive I have seen. So many posts you see out there seem to argue that because the client pays he (and it usually a he) is in effect topping and controlling the session. But that argument has never felt right to me and Ms Slide, better than anyone, has shown me why.

Whilst Bitchy Jones (whose blog I really do like) rants on often about Pro-Dommes and why in her view they are wrong, Ms Slide has offered up a view that makes sense and shows that females are still in charge.

Thank-you Ms Slide for the post.

A new situation

I find myself in a new situation, quite unexpectedly and time will tell how it develops and whether i have the stamina to stay. I feel I cannot say to much but am sure that I will be able to say more later as it develops as, having already disclosed this blog to Her, it could well become the vehicle for expressing more of my thoughts to Her, but that is not guaranteed.

Credibility - to have or not to have, that is the question.

There I am, having a chat on yahoo to a person who I am starting to like a lot, probably too much but that's a different story, when we start talking about this blog. She is only the second person I have told about it and probably the last!

I am conscious that some of the stuff I have written may seem that I can do no wrong. But that is not my intention. I have many faults and accept most of them. I am, for instance, overweight. But, I deal with it and just move on. I am, on occasion, a bit bratty and will throw my toys out and sulk from time to time. But have only portrayed the worse in others whilst setting my self up as without fault? Mostly, reading back, I have just said what was on my mind and how I felt about things. But I was, indirectly, today told that because I seem to not paint myself with faults, to an outsider who may come across this blog, it would weaken my credibility.

Now, of course, do I have any credibility? I know that I am quite well known on the fetish scene and do get asked my views on all sorts of stuff to do with fetish and BDSM. In my vanilla world, I regularly speak and present about my subject matter and would like to think that I am well regarded in what I do. So, perhaps I do have some credibility but by hiding behind the veil of anonymity I remove all that credibility. But of course, the reverse of being anonymous is that I can just comment on what I see and experience without having to compare myself to it. This blog was and will always be about what I think and what I see and feel. It will, by its nature be occasionally judgemental but that is the nature of man. We are all judgemental on one level or more, so there is no difference here.

Finally, as I write this I feel I am having to justify myself. I have no need to or desire to so no more posts where I may apologise. I am me and happy with me and therefore shall just carry on as me.

At last - someone like me!

I have finally found a blog that seems to relate very much to my own feelings and desires for BDSM. By far the majority of blogs I seem to come across are about guys wanting a 24/7 relationship or they are exploring BDSM inside their marriage or (and this is the majority by far) are blogs by female submissive's of which I have zero interest. However, the power of Google Reader gave me a suggestion today to look at unspeakableaxe and hey presto, a blog by a male masochist who seems to like to play at parties, clubs etc! Having spent way to much time reading the message-boards on UK-Mistresses.com it was becoming rather depressing as I found the majority of posts and comments there just so sycophant that it was beyond belief. And when someone disagree with the swarm of resident posters there, they were soon shot down by a barrage of posts. Similarly with Informed Consent the sheer volume of posts make it impossible to follow some of the threads. So finding this blog was a big of fresh air for me.