I was reading an ad on one of the myriad of contact sites recently and one struck me in the words used by the poster - "I do like to be a very dominat woman!" (her spelling of the word not mine). I thought that in certain circumstances I like to be a very dominant man as well but that does not mean I want to be a Dom. Far from it. So, just because someone is dominant does that mean they make a good Domme. It is an essential quality?
Personally, I look for other qualities - extroverted but not aggressive, controlling but not overbearing, decisive but not impetuous, consistent, confident, honest and open, persuasive, caring, responsible, having a strong sense of self. But, if I look at this list I also see that a lot of this applies to myself. So where does the line divide between being submissive and being dominant when, to me, we seem to share many of the same characteristics. I suspect it is the desire to hand over that control and for someone to accept it and take control of someone who that defines the difference. That is the defining quality of each of us in this lifestyle
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